>Life lessons

>Sebastian and I took a trip to the Great White North this week (and by that we mean to Canada, a whole two hours away) to spend some time with Auntie Gina and Xavier.  It turned out to be the Boot Camp of social learning.  Every five to ten minutes sounded something like this.

Me:  Don’t grab your cousin.  You have to wait your turn.
SP:  (while grabbing Xavier) No grabbing.
Me: (removing his hand)  That’s right.  Be gentle.  It’s Xavier’s turn.
SP:  (meltdown)
Me:  I know you want to play with the truck now.  You can play with the other truck.
SP:  (whining) THIS truck.
Me:  It’s Xavier’s turn with this truck.  You have to wait your turn.
SP:  (with big fat tears sliding down his cheeks)  Pro’ly wait our turn?
Me:  Yes, we have to wait our turn to play.
SP:  Bastian turn?
Me:  Not yet, but you can wait or help push Xavier on the truck.
SP:  Bastian push truck.
X:  (staring at this ridiculous scene, then driving away on his truck while Sebastian “pushes” the back of it)
SP:  (proudly)  Good sharing, boys!
Me:   Yes, that’s good sharing.

Sigh.  I know you are reading this exchange thinking that this is what happens when one has an only child who doesn’t have to share and doesn’t go to day care.  The thing is, you’d be only partially right.  Sebastian has a TON of opportunities throughout his week to see other toddlers and have to share with them.  Most of the time he handles it calmly.  But four days straight was apparently too much all at once.  Thank goodness his little brother or sister will start wanting to share his toys a bit more gradually.  Nevertheless, Sebastian is also just in that temper tantrum phase in which he pitches a fit whenever he doesn’t get his way, no matter what the cause.  Only child syndrome again?  I think mostly it’s just an early version of the terrible twos.  But I had to really wonder (see lesson 2 below).

We also learned that he has inherited his mother’s hanger, which for those of you who are unrelated to me is when he gets angry if he goes too long without a meal.  Feeding him regularly increased his ability to share probably tenfold.  I take full blame for this genetic quirk, and now you know why I bring snacks (for both of us) everywhere. 

What I learned about myself these past five days would be the following:

1.  I’m grateful I don’t have twins.  Aunt Lori, my hat would be off to you, if I were wearing one. 

2.  Motherhood has taught me all new levels of guilt and self-doubt.  Is Sebastian spoiled, or just going through a phase?  Is it my fault that he isn’t as easygoing as his cousin?  Are my responses making the situations better or worse?  Was this summer really the right time to introduce a new sibling to the mix? 

3.  Losing an hour of sleep to spring forward is B for Bad, even if it does mean that he is still sleeping at “7”.  Because let’s face it, people, he isn’t going to bed tonight until at least 8.  Boo.

4.  Toddler tantrums:  one emotional year off Mama’s life per day. 
Watching the boys play together or splash around joyously in the bath :  Priceless.